When One Moment Changes Everything

This past January, I was driving by myself all the way from Georgia to Maryland. I was doing a good thing—I was headed to support a dear friend at her father’s funeral.

But on that trip, exhaustion caught up with me. For just one moment, I zoned out. That one moment was enough to cause a car accident that totaled our car.

No one else was injured. I was still alive. I still made it to the funeral, which was my original purpose. Yet, what I carried in the days afterward was heavy: the guilt, the shame, and the embarrassment of that single mistake.

It’s easy to let those feelings overshadow everything else. But here’s the truth I had to learn: one moment does not erase all the others. 

The Caregiver’s Parallel

Caregiving can feel the same way. You may do countless things right—advocate, nurture, organize, sacrifice. But then there’s a moment when you forget something, lose your patience, or feel too tired to show up the way you want.

That one moment can feel like it defines the whole journey. Guilt and shame creep in, and before long, you’re measuring yourself by your hardest moment instead of the many others filled with love and presence. 

A Lesson Learned

What I took from that accident is this:

• One mistake doesn’t cancel out your purpose.
• One moment of weakness doesn’t erase all your strength.
• One slip doesn’t define the whole journey.

As caregivers, we have to learn to extend grace to ourselves. Vigilance is important, yes, but compassion—for ourselves—is essential.

Moving Forward

Caregiving was never meant to be perfect. It was meant to be shared, supported, and filled with grace for the moments when exhaustion takes over.

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Remember: one moment doesn’t define your caregiving story.